Someone I know got murdered and an unplanned outing

So the day started out like any other I have had. I woke up and came down stairs at about eleven am. I spent most of the day on the computer. It was a holiday so I did not have to go into work. I watched some TV and just wasted the day by kicking back.

Playing football for the Palouse Thunder I had a chance to meet a man named Bob Mars. He is from the Tri-Cities and taught in Benton City. I talked to him for a moment during out game against the Tri-Cityies Rattlers. He was one of their coaches. I noticed he looked very similiar to someone I knew in Pullman. I asked him what his name was. He told me. I then asked him if he was related to _________. He said he was not. I was shocked how similiar they are.

Well today on the news there was a story about a high school football coach that had been murdered. They flashed his picture and name. I skipped a heart beat. It was the same guy I knew. I could not believe it. A person I had talked to a matter of a few months ago was now dead.

He was at the school to drop off a video tape of the high school football game. He was not found until the next morning laying in the hallway of the school. Video tape still in hand. His truck was in the parking lot with the driver window smashed out.

They said he died hours before, but the man did not die instantly it sounds like. He was stabbed once in the abdomin. He bled to death. A man with no reason to be dead today is dead. Sometimes early this morning his life blood bled from his body and he died. I can't believe it.

This is the only person I have known to be killed by murder.

Then it happened. I was getting ready for dinner. I was getting the butter and honey to set the table. My mom was on her computer in the den. She called for me to come in there. I walked in expecting to see some sort of spyware thing on the computer. Instead I saw my blog. I heart sank and I got quiet. I am sure my blood pressure and heart rate went through the roof. I could feel my heart beating and I could feel myself starting to shake.

After 30 plus years of hiding from my parents and family it has come to reality. My life has changed! It can never go back to what it was like this morning or yesterday. This is a new life. This is my new life where my mom knows that I am gay. She read some of my blog and there it was. Undeniable. It was me. I can't tell you how much I did not want to this day to come.

I certainly was not ready for that day to be today. Thankfully she told me she loved me and did not care about my choices. She wants to be part of my life. She also told me she would not tell anyone else in the family. I know she will try but someday it will slip out. Someday the homophobic part of my family will find out about me.

Wow... This is messed up. I wish I wasn't gay.

A little bit later I was cleaning up after dinner and getting the left-overs ready for the dog. My mom was going up stairs. Then she came back. She said she loves me no matter what and gave me a kiss on the cheek.