Tyler died

I slept until about eight am when I needed to get up and go to the bathroom. After going I went back to bed for a while. Waking up at about eleven am to a lot of gurgling. My plumbing system was having troubles again. So, I called Sampson Plumbing to come look at it for Monday.

I went to the IS office and worked for three hours I needed to make up. I got some of the computers worked on that I needed to get done. Now I just need to meet with the owner and get the rest of it finished. I went to the fire station and chatted with Ken for a little while before heading home to change and getting to Pullman for duty. I went to Mr. Z's Casino for a while. I lost sixty bucks. My biggest loss to date there. Then I went to the fire station and waited until it was time to rig checks.

I went out to start to work on the rigs at seven o'clock. I turned on the radio and got underway. I took the cabinets on the right side of rescue apart and did a good cleaning. I also cleaned the door. I inventoried the equipment. Bryan worked on the rest of the rescue. he did not do any cleaning, just checking to make sure the equipment was all in working order.

After we were done with working on the rescue we washed the engine and then went in and talked about the crew. Since it is just four of us now we really need to make sure we have coverage all the time. We also talked about my coroner's needs.

Bryan and I went to station one to get equipment. It was a long quiet ride. I did not say anything to him and he did not say anything to me. It was like that the whole way there and back. I think it is clear there is no friendship between us.

When we got back I wiped down rescue from the road grime and left. I went to my office and played on the net for a while. I found a website a long time ago called A Thousand Deaths. Saying that a suicide victim dies ones but the survivor dies a thousand times. I read the site and it is full of many sad stories. Many young people who kill themselves. Many times they are good looking people. I think about what a waste that is.

I was readying about a Tyler Scott Burbank who died from suicide at age nineteen. Then when I was looking for more information I found that there was a fictional story about an eighteen year old who died as a result of a car accident. The teens name was Tyler Burbank. At first I thought it was a story about the real Tyler. I thought that it would a tale of the "beginning of the end for Tyler." I did not think he would die in the car accident. I contacted the author who said the article was pure fiction. He had never heard of the real Tyler. My last e-mail to the author of the story is attached:

Jordan,

Actually I was trying to find out more, that is how I
came across your site. Here is all I know:
http://www.1000deaths.com/library/writing/tyler19.html

Pretty sparse. When you described the blood going in to
his curly hair, I was surprised since the photo of Tyler
shows him with a curly looking hair.

I can say they story that you had I was pretty into it.
I was pulling for Tyler to live. Since I was reading it
thinking this happened to a real person, I think it
affected me differently.

It was frustrating to have Tyler go so far and get so close
to getting help to only die right there. The poor mother
and father. It is such an all round sad story for them.
Mom would always kick her self in the rear for not acting
on your suspicions earlier. She will always have those
"if only..." doubts in her mind.

It is like the parents who came home seven minutes after
their son shot himself. They will always think of something
they did that they did not need to do that would have
changed that time line. Their son wrote his note and signed
it at 11:45. They got home at 11:52. Suicide is such a
terrible thing.

What was really getting me was thinking that your story was
a real one about Tyler. And since we knew what he was
thinking, I was assuming he lived through the car accident.
And I was thinking about how he worked so hard to live.
To me I was thinking about Tyler had such a will to live, I
wondered many times through out the story what caused him to
lose that will to live.

Of course now knowing it was fiction answers those questions,
but it is a little eerie to have something have some parallel
to real life.

Scotty