It is time to walk away.

I got my response from Chief about interviewing for a room in the station. He said I will not be getting one and he would not interview me. He also said that he asked about the sores on my arms because people were worried that they were some sort of contagious skin condition. I call bull crap on that answer. I do have one problem; I like to pick my scabs. That just sounds so gross. But I do it all the time. I can't help it. There is something that keeps me picking at them. So my sores stay around longer because I am always messing with them.

So that has gotten me into a pissy mood. Top that off with the little things that happen to me at Colfax fire. There is one guy who is hugely anti-Pullman. I think he does stuff to give me a hard time. They are little things but they add up. The latest was him telling me that people are complaining about me not wearing coveralls on calls during the day. He said that it has been talked about and people should wear only coveralls or a full uniform. A Colfax fire shirt is not enough. The reason that makes me mad is that I was only doing what other people who have been on the department for a long time do. I will watch to see if the others stop doing it or if I am the only one who has been talked to.

I am at the point where I wanna just tell them to take their fire engines and stuff it. All I want to do is help people. I want to get out there and do my best. It seems like that is not enough for some people. They all want to bitch and make an issue out of everything. They are a bunch of drama queens. I am tired of it. You can't just go and do your job. Someone else is there to put you down behind your back and make fun of you.

I am tried of all of it. I am sort of getting tired of working all the time in some ways. It is not bad when I enjoy what I do. I work about three to four hundred hours a month. More than one hundred of those hours are at Pullman Fire and then there is between twenty and thirty hours at Colfax fire. Feeling the way I do, I don't enjoy the work anymore. Instead of doing what I like, now I am doing what I don't like.

I think I am going to actively pursuit a job in the Seattle area and get out of here all together. I want to get paid about six or seven thousand more a month than I get paid now. I want to work less than two hundred hours a month.

Anyway, I found coverage for my shift tomorrow at the fire department. John is mad because I would be missing training. I will see about going to training and then going back to Colfax afterwards. I need to find coverage for some of the other days. I just want time away from the fire department for now. I have also turned off my Colfax pager.

I know fate has its way of working. So many times in the past I did not get what I wanted at the time, but in the long run it was for the best and things worked out okay. I try to use this as assurance and to make me feel better but it does not help too much.

When I got off work I looked up a few jobs and applied for them. I went to the store and got some groceries. I did the dishes. It was nice to get some stuff done around the house. I made myself some dinner and I was in bed shortly after ten pm. Hopefully I will be able to sleep and get some good rest for once.